GOSSIP

Three teenage girls were roomates. One Friday night all had gone out on dates and by chance they came home at th same time. The first one came in and said, with a smug look on her face, “You know you’ve been on a good date when you come home with your hair all messed…

I told a girl in the pub about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her boobs…“Really?” she said, “Go on then…try.” After about thirty seconds of fondling she lost patience and demanded “Come on, what day was I born?” “Yesterday.” I replied.

An old man was sitting on a train… across from a blonde wearing a tiny mini skirt. Despite his efforts, he was unable to stop staring at the top of her thighs. To his delight, he realized she was going commando She saw him staring and inquired, “Are you looking at my vagina?” “Yes, I’m…

A dying American soldier in a battlefield hospital in Iraq tells the nurse: “How I wish I could kiss the American flag before I die!” Nurse: (Extremely touched by the soldier’s patriotism): “Actually, as card-carrying Republican, I have the American flag tattooed on my bottom. You may kiss my ass, if you don’t mind it.”…

there were three women who always hung their laundry out in the backyard two of the women noticed Sophie never had her laundry out on days that it rained one day they were all out in the backyard putting their clothes on the line when one of the women said to Sophie how come when…

three guys were sitting in a biker bar a man came in already drunk sat down at the bar and ordered a drink the man looked around and saw the three men sitting at the corner table he got up staggered to the table leaned over looked the biggest one in the face and said…

Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face and told her mother Frankie Brown showed me his wiie today at a playground before the mother could raise a concern Sally went on to say it reminded me of a peanut relaxing with a hidden smile Sally’s mom asked really small was…

one day during a lesson on proper grammar the teacher asked for a show of hands for who could use the word beautiful in the same sentence Twice first she called on Little Susie who responded with my father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it very good Susie replied…

an old lady walked into a pest store found a parrot and asked the owner if she could buy it the owner said heck no that parrot has a bad mouth trust me you do not want that parent she said I can teach it good man but when she got home the Paris said…

having just finish reading a story to my sixth grade class I decided to check the students knowledge of some of the vocabulary that had been used who knows what the word adolescent means I asked out of the entire class of 35 not one child raise a hand after a few more silent moments…