GOSSIP

A wife sent a message to her husband: “Don’t forget to buy vegetables on your way back from the office, and Priscilla says hi to you.” Husband: Who is Priscilla? Wife: Nobody, I was just making sure you read my message. Husband: But I’m with Priscilla right now, so which Priscilla are you talking about?…

This woman is walking past a brothel, when she notices a sign which readsCelebrity S*xWayne Rooney $500 per nightBabe Ruth $700 per nightFather Christmas $2000 per nightSo she goes in to enquire about the price list, the manager tells her that the reason Wayne Rooney is so cheap is because he ‘dribbles before he shoots’,and…

A man saw a lady with big вrеаsтs. He asked, “Excuse me, can I bite your вrеаsтs for $1000?”She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her вrеаsтs for 10 minutes.”Eventually the lady asks, “Aren’t you gonna bite them?”He replies, “No, it’s too…

A drunк woman, stark nакеd, jumped into a taxi in New York City. The taxi driver, who happened to be an old Punjabi man, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman. He made no attempt to start the cab.She said to him, “What’s wrong with you honey? Haven’t you ever seen a nакеd…

One day, the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring.“Where did you get that ring?” her husband asks.“Well, she replies,“My boss and I played the lottery and we won, so I bought it with my share of the winnings.”A week later, his wife comes home with a long shiny fur coat.Where did you get…

My wife and I sat down with our son and I said… “Billy, you were adopted.” Billy looked at us. His face was red and full of anger “I demand to meet my biological parents!” My wife softly said “We ARE your biological parents. Now, hurry and pack.”

A guy is in a bar and sees some attractive looking woman sitting there. Maybe 50 but with a killer body. He buys her a drink. She asks him if he wants a deer hunter special. He asks what that is. She says that her husband is away deer hunting for days. The deer hunter…

18 year old Maria went home happy, telling her mother about how she earned $20 by climbing a small mountain. Her mom responded, “Maria, they just wanted to see your p@nties!” Maria replied, “See Mom, I was smart, I took them off!”

Two older women were fussing about their husbands over tea one day.“I do wish my Leroy would stop biting his nails. That makes me terribly nervous,” the first one said.“Oh, my Elmer used to do the same thing,” the other woman commented. “But I broke him of that habit real quick.”“What did you do?”“I hid…

A man notices that his wife’s вuтт is growing in size. “I’m sure your вuтт is as huge as my grill.”His wife scoffs, but he grabs a tape measure, measures her bottom, measures the grill, and taunts her that they’re approximately the same size.That night, he attempts to see if he can strike it rich….