GOSSIP

A man comes to the doctor with a frog on his head… So the doctor asks the man: “What can I help you with?” To which the frog responds: “Well, it all started with a little lump on my b*tt.”

A woman pregnant with triplets was walking down the street when a masked robber ran out of a bank and shot her three times in the stomach. Luckily the babies were alright. The surgeon decided to leave the bullets in because it was too risky to operate. She gave birth to two healthy daughters and…

A biker went to a bar and ordered a drink. As he sat sipping his whiskey, a young lady sat down next to him. She turned to the biker and asked, “Are you a real biker?” He replied, “Well, I’ve spent my whole life on Harleys. My momma was pregnant with me when she rode…

A young couple got married, and in their family, it was tradition that the best man dance with the bride for the first song. Well, this happened…but then they danced for the second song too. And the third. By the time the fourth song came on, the groom ran up and kicked the bride between…

She agrees, and he decides to rent a suit. The rental has a long line, so he waits and waits, and finally gets his suit. He decides to buy flowers, so he goes to the flower shop. The flower shop has a long line, so he waits and waits, until he finally buys his flowers….

The old king was suspicious of the young queen cheating on him. So, with the help of a witch, he placed an invisible blade in the Queen’s Hoo-Haw. 3 days later, the King summoned all the men he suspected and ordered them to take of their p@nts. To the King’s surprise, he found that all…

A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country. After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep…

The room was full of pregnant women and their partners, and the Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along with informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan. The teacher then announced, “Ladies, exercise is good for you….

A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game? The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists…

Wife: “Honey, can you please help me clean the garden?” Husband: “Do I look like a gardener?” Wife: “Ok, can you fix the bathroom door then?” Husband: “Do I look like a carpenter?” He left and when he returned a few hours later, he noticed that the garden had been cleaned, and the bathroom door…