Flirty Dog
batch of medals.”I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I’m just retired.’The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. Ten dollars,’ the guy says. Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?’Because he’s a liar….
Addicted Guys go to the Hypnotist
himself. He says “fu*k it. That guy way full shit. There’s no way one little drinkwill kill me.” And goes into the bar. The other 2 men; curious to see what happens, wait for him outside.Minutes later the alcoholic opens the bar door, takes one step onto the sidewalk, and drops dead. The other 2…
When Trump S@ucks the Urine
of the SS says “Mr President, I’ve got good news and bad news. The good news is we’ve done a dna test on the urine, and found the culprit. It turns out it’s Mike Pence’s.” “That traitor”, shouts Trump. “I’ll have him hanged! Now, what did you say was the bad news?” “Well”, says the…
An old Couple is ready to go to Sleep
MORE FUNNY JOKES A few months after his parents were divorced – Funny Story
A few months after his parents were divorced – Funny Story
Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times.One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning.When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her.Little Johnny ran into his room, took off hisclothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning,“Ohh, I…
My friend got a Job as a…
So my friend got a job as a P0RN star the other day. His first time doing that. The director comes up to him and says “so for this scene, you’re going to be doing m!ss!onary s*x with that young lady over there”. My friend, kind of awkward, he says “Ok, so is there any…
Dylan was practicing his golf swing.
Dylan was practicing his golf swing in his front yard when he swung a little too hard and sent the ball through his neighbors window. Dylan ran over and rang the doorbell three times. After no one answered for a few minutes, he opened the door to see broken glass everywhere, a lamp lying on…