GOSSIP

One day he goes to his smart son and he tell him “Bring this duck to the market and sell it for 5 dollars. If you sell for any extra go ahead and take that to the whorehouse on your way back home.” So the son goes to the market with the duck, manages to…

A little girl and boy are fighting about the differences between the sexes, and which one is better. Finally, the boy drops his pants and says, “Here’s something I have that you’ll never have!” The little girl is pretty upset by this, since it is clearly true, and runs home crying. A while later, she…

The elderly Italian man went to his parish priest and asked if the priest would hear his confession. “Of course, my son,” said the priest. “Well, Father, at the beginning of World War Two, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans; I hid her in my…

Four guys have been going to the same fishing trip for many years.Two days before the group is to leave, Ron’s wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn’t going. Ron’s mates are very upset that he can’t go, but what can they do. Two days later the three mates get to the…

Three men met on a nude beach. Two of the three men were happy, but the third was sad. The three men broke into a conversation. Eventually, they started talking about their jobs, and why they were at the beach. “I’m a construction worker,” said the first man. “All day long I toil in the…

A nun came to the priest for confession and said: “Holy Father, I am a sinner: I indulge in gluttony, get drunk and sleep with men.”The Holy Father listened to her and said: “I know, my daughter.”The nun asks: “Holy Father, how do you know this?!”“I follow your Instagram.”

The truck driver returned from his flight, took off his wife’s p@nties and began to fulfill his marital duty. After one minute he gets off her and says: “Honey, I’m done. Yesterday I read that during s*x a man burns as many calories as if he had run six miles!” The wife says displeasedly: “Dear,…

Little Johnny came home from school and found his n@ked mother on his neighbor’s stomach. The neighbor silently gets out of bed, puts on his underpants and, as if nothing had happened, goes to the bathroom. Little Johnny looks at this and says, “Damn it! Neighbor, who are you after that?”The neighbor tells him, “You…

Before the trip, the truck driver put a ch@stity belt on his wife. His partner asks him: “John, why did you do this? After all, she’s scary, no one will look at her.”“I know. When I get back, I’ll tell her that I lost the key.”

Three women are sitting in a cafe, talking about their husbands.“My husband is a miner,” says Heather. “I like being in bed with him because he has an incredible shaft.” “Mine is a dentist,” says Linda. “I like being in bed with him because no one can drill like he can.” “You’re both lucky,” says…