GOSSIP

How He knows that man is single? A man is buying a banana, an apple and two eggs. The cashier says: “you must be single” The man replied: “Wow how did you know that ?” Cashier: “ Because you’re ugly”

A beautiful young woman, on an international flight, asked the priest beside her, “Father, may I ask a favor?” “Of course you may. What can I do for you?” “Well, I bought this expensive electronic hair dryer that is well over the Customs limits and I’m afraid that they’ll confiscate it from me. Is there…

Son: “Daddy i fell in love and want to date this awesome girl!! “ Father : “That’s great son. Who is she?” Son: “It’s Tina, the neighbor’s daughter”. Father : “Ohhh I wish you hadn’t said that. I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother. Tina is…

A scrawny teenage boy asks his muscular friend how he gets so many girls to sleep with him. The muscular friend says, “Here’s what you do: next time there’s a party, get a large potato and stick it down your pants and act normal. You’ll see – that’ll turn you into a chick magnet.” A…

A Mexican man who spoke no English went into a department store to buy socks. He found his way to the menswear department where a young lady offered to help him. “Quiero calcetines,” said the man. “I don’t speak Spanish, but we have some very nice suits over here,” said the salesgirl. “No, no quiero…

A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, “I’ve had enough and have left you. Don’t bother coming after me.” Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction. After a short while, the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen…

A woman complained to her friend she had a sore throat! The friend replied: “Whenever I have a sore throat, I just give my husband a BJ and the soreness goes away!” They meet the next day, and the woman says: I took your advice! You were right, the soreness disappeared immediately! “Your husband couldn’t…

A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner. The girl tells her boyfriend that she would like to “do it” for the first time. The boy is ecstatic but he has never done it before so he goes to the pharmacist to get some protection. The pharmacist helps the boy…

A Ballerina goes to the doctor, “Doc I am having terrible trouble with the most awful wind. Every time I pirouette I fart,” she cries. “Hmmm,” says the Doctor, “I’d like to see that if possible.” The ballerina get up, pirouettes and Phrrrt… farts loudly. “That’s amazing, do it again.” Again the pirouette is accompanied…

A husband says to his wife”I bet you can’t tell me something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time,” a husband says to his wife. She thinks about it for a moment and then responds, “Your gun is bigger than your brother’s.”