Two women are watching a film in the cinema when oneturns to the other in surprise.“You’re not going to believe this, Mav, but the man sittingnext to me is masturbating.”“Dirty bugger, just ignore him,” she hisses.“I can’t, he’s using my hand.”

While on holiday, the Seven Dwarfs visit the local convent tobuy some souvenirs. They meet up with the Mother Superiorand Dopey stops to talk to her.“Excuse me, your holy one, do you have any short nunshere?” Mother Superior is quite puzzled by the question butreplies, “Not very short, some around 5 foot.” “Are you sure…

Taking his girlfriend to the cinema, the man’s wig fell offwhen they were canoodling in the back row. As he feltaround trying to find it, his hand accidentally went up hisgirlfriend’s skirt.“Oooh…” she moaned, “Go on, go on, that’s it.”“No, it can’t be,” he said. “I part mine on the right.”

Three men went out on the town and landed up at a sleazynightclub. As they drank their beers, a n@ked go-go dancerperformed on the table in front of them and at the end ofthe dance the audience showed its appreciation by throwingher money. The first man grinned at his mates, took £10 outof his pocket…

Tom was so shy he’d never had the courage to ask a girl outso his mate Jack decided to take him out on the town and gethim laid. Halfway through the evening they were drinking ina nightclub when a girl at the other end of the bar winked atTom.“Hey, Jack,” he stuttered, “that girl over…

There’s a badminton competition at the local leisure centreand a young man, seeing a girl all on her own, decides to goand ask her if she would like to team up with him for adoubles match. Much to his astonishment she yells at the topof her voice, “How dare you. No I will not join…

A naive young man was encouraged to dance with one of thevillage girls. As the dance became faster, one of the girl’searrings dropped off and fell down her back.“Be a darling and get that for me,” she asked her partner.“Yes,” he stammered, but the more he reached for it, thefurther down her back it fell.“Ahem,”…

Now young Tom, born and brought up in the city, was givena chance to visit his cousin who lived on a farm in thecountry. It was all very strange to him, particularly when hewent into the milking shed and saw all the cows attached tothe milking machines and the milk pouring out into thebuckets. As…

Two six-year-old boys are standing in the toilet having a pee.One turns to the other and says, “Your dinky doesn’t haveany skin on it.”“That’s because I’ve been circumcised,” he replies.“Cor! What does that mean?” “It means the skin’s been cut off the end.”“How old were you when they did that?”“About two days old.”“Did it hurt?”“It…