GOSSIP

Tom and John are hanging out. Tom asks John, “It’s fuuckin’ freezin’ in here. Can you get me my fuuckin’ slippers?” John goes upstairs to get the slippers and he comes across Tom’s hot 21-year-old twin sisters. He tells them, “Your brother told me to have sxx with both of you.” One of the sisters…

however, states that she can deliver only one wish, not the standard three. Without giving much thought, one man blurts out, “Make the entire ocean into beer!” The genie claps her hands and the entire sea turns into brew. The other man looks disgustedly at the one who made the wish and says, “Nice going!…

Finally, one man says, “Okay, but we start at 6:30 a.m.”He figures the early tee-time will discourage her. The woman says this may be a problem and asks if she can be up to 15 minutes late.They roll their eyes, but say, “Okay.”She’s there at 6:30 am. sharp and beats all of them with an…

An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the…

no arms and no legs. She asks: what do you want?He says: I came because of the newspaper ad.Her: do you meet the first requirement?Him: I got no arms, so I can’t hit you.Her: do you meet the second requirement?Him: I got no legs, so I can never leave you.Her: what about the third requirement?Him:…