GOSSIP

Teacher in class asks riddles. She asks little Johnny: “It’s a small animal with 4 legs. What is it?” Little Johnny says: “Dog.” Teacher replies: “But could be a cat too. Alright, another one. It’s a long, thin animal with no legs.” Little Johnny: “A snake.” Teacher: “Could be. But could also be an eel.”…

On their first date, a man asked his companion if she’d like a drink with dinner. “Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?” she said. Later, he offered her a cigarette. “Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?” she said again. On the drive home, he saw a motel….

A Man Is Lying In Bed In The Hospital Wearing An Oxygen Mask Over His Mouth And Nose A young student nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. “Nurse,”‘ he mumbles from behind the mask, “are my testicles black?” Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, Sir. I’m only here to wash…

I was once passing through a town in England when this lady stopped me because she needed help fixing her car that had broken down. As I was fixing the car, the lady would cross the road and shout “Hello” at me. This happened a few times as the lady found it really amusing. I…

It was AD 1095 and all the good knights were leaving for the Crusades. One knight told his best friend, “My bride is without doubt one of the most beautiful women in the world. It would be a terrible waste if no man could have her… … Therefore, as my best and most trusted friend,…

As soon as the newlyweds returned from their honeymoon, the young bride called her mother, who lived a couple of hours away. “How did everything go?” her mom asked. “Oh, mother,” she began, “The honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic, we had a terrific time. But, mother, on our way back, Andy started using really horrible…

Two women talk. One of them says: – You know, I have cheated a taxi driver yesterday!! Another asks: – How did you do this? The women replies: – I paid, but I didn’t sit in.

A blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says, “Six Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.” The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing, “That’s horrible!” Confused, he replies, “Yes Dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is always that risk involved.” After a few minutes, the…

A woman has to go to Italy for a conference, so her husband drives her to the airport. “Thank you, honey”, she says. “What would you like me to bring back for you?” He laughs and says, “An Italian girl!” When the conference is over, he meets her at the airport and asks, “So, honey,…

My wife had some tattoos done on the cheeks of her Back. She said to the tattooist I would like a butterfly on each cheek. Tattooist says, sorry I can’t do butterflies, I can do Bee’s though. So my wife said okay they are nice as well. She came home, dropped her p@nts turned round…