GOSSIP

A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons. So he knocked on the door to clarify the point. The…

One day the teacher walks into her classroom and notices that someone has written the word P*NIS in tiny letters on the blackboard. She scans the class looking for a guilty face. Finding none, she erases the obscenity and begins class. The next day, the word P*NIS is written on the board again, this time…

A little girl says to her mother: “Mummy, when you were away at work a strange lady came around”… “Not now,” says Mummy. “Wait until Daddy gets home.” So they wait until Daddy gets home, and then Mummy says “Now dear, what were you saying about Daddy and the strange lady?” And Daddy starts to…

They arrive at the club and the doorman says, “Hey, Dave! How ya doin’?”  His wife is puzzled and asks if hes been to this club before. “Oh no,” says Dave. “Hes on my bowling team.” When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if hed like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His…

Yesterday, I went swimming with a beautiful female colleague. At first, the female colleague refused to enter the water. She kept saying that she didn’t want to ruin her makeup. But we convinced her to come in anyway, and she eventually started to enjoy herself. As she swam around, we couldn’t help but notice that…

A school teacher sent a letter to all parents after day one of the new term which said “If you can promise that you will not believe all that your child says goes on at school, I will promise you

One day a blonde came home from school and came to her mother and said, “Hey, Mommy! Mommy! Today in school we learned to count. The other kids could only count to three but I can count to ten….. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!” The mother responds, “Very good honey.”…

Husband and Wife had a Fight. Wife called Mom: He fought with me again, I am coming to you. Mom: No Daughter, he must pay for his mistake, I am coming to stay with you!

The Mexican Maid asked for a pay rise. The wife was very upset about this and decided to talk to her about the raise. She asked, “Now Maria, why do you want more pay?” Maria: “Well, Senora, there are tree reasons why I wanna increase. The first eez that I iron better than you.” Wife:…

A little girl was sitting at the kitchen table, drawing a picture of her mom and dad with crayons. She started thinking about her grandparents… but what about her grandparents’ parents? And their parents? Thoughtfully, she asked her mother, “Mom, where do people come from? I mean, does everyone have parents?” her mother answered, “God…