YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGZINE
A panda walks into a bar. He asks the bartender how he can get a little action for the night. The bartender motions to a young woman. She talks to the panda, and they go back to her place. After having s-x, the panda abruptly leaves. The next night, the woman goes to the panda’s…
Two days before my wife’s birthday I asked her what her br@ size was. “Ooh,” she said. “Thinking of getting me a new one?” I said, “No. I just wanted to see how they compared with your sister’s.”
Doctor to Nurse: Please give me anesthesia? New Joiner Nurse: But sir only one injection was available here. Doctor: We also need only one. Nurse: Sir I already have been give you. Doctor: When? Nurse: When you said Doctor: I am feeling sleepiness. Nurse: Sir i think anesthesia is start working now. Doctor: Oh my…
An old lady went to visit her dentist. When it was her turn, she sat in the chair, lowered her underpants, and raised her legs. The dentist said, “Excuse me, but I’m not a gynecologist.” “I know,” said the old lady. “I want you to take my husband’s teeth out.
A young man was getting ready to graduate college For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer’s showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted. As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car….
A man is driving home one night while very aroused As he is passing a pumpkin patch, he thinks to himself, “Pumpkins are soft and squishy and there’s no one around for miles. He pulls over and pulls out a juicy pumpkin, cuts the appropriate hole in it and begins to slake his desires. Soon…
Early one morning, my husband, who works in a funeral home, woke me, complaining of severe abdominal pains. We rushed to the emergency room, where they gave him a series of tests to determine the source of the pain. My husband decided not to have me call in sick for him until we knew what…
A man gets on a bus and sits next to a lady with a child .. The mother is trying to get her fussy son to breastfeed, she finally gets frustrated and tells the baby, “You better take to the milk, or I’ll give it to this man sitting here… “She tries a few more…
One day, the phone rang, and a little boy answered. “May I speak to your parents?” “They’re busy.” “Oh. Is anybody else there?” “The police.” “Can I speak to them?” “They’re busy.” “Oh. Is anybody else there?” “The firemen.” “Can I speak to them?” “They’re busy.” “So let me get this straight — your parents,…
There was this Asian lady married to an English gentleman and they lived in London. The poor lady was not very proficient in English, but managed to communicate with her husband. The real problem arose whenever she had to shop for groceries. One day, she went to the butcher and wanted to buy pork legs….