GOSSIP

A husband and wife are having dinner at a very fine restaurant when an absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big open-mouthed kiss, then says she’ll see him later and walks away. ‪‪ The wife glares at her husband and says, “Who in the hell was that?” “Oh,”…

The pilot safely performs an emergency landing in water, and tells the passengers to remain seated and to keep the doors closed, stating that in emergency situations, the aircraft is designed to stay afloat for 30 minutes, giving rescuers time to get to them. Just then a man gets out if his seat and runs…

Out on the golf course with his wife, the husband says, “Twenty years ago I had a brief affair. It meant nothing. I hope you can forgive me.” His wife was hurt but said, “Dearest, those days are long gone. What we have now is far more valuable. I forgive you.” They embraced and kissed,…

On his first day he took off his clothes and started to wander around the area. A gorgeous petite blonde walks by, and the man immediately gets an er@ction. The woman notices his er@ction, walks over to him and asks, “did you call for me?” The man, obviously embarrassed, replies, “No, what do you mean?”…

In the jungle a hyena was talking to a monkey. He said to the monkey “You see that big clump of trees over there?” The monkey says “Yes, what about them?” “Well, I go through there every day to get home, I don’t have to, it’s just a shortcut” said the hyena “Alright, so?” asked…

A man and his wife went to a “s*xologist”. The “Doctor” took the husband in first. The husband was a bit embarrassed and told the “Doctor” he had trouble getting an erection with his wife and she was getting frustrated. He checked his blood pressure and other things and finally told him he would see…

On their first night to be together, the newly wed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom, all showered and wearing her beautiful robe. The proud husband says, “my dear, we are married now, you can open your robe.” The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished….

The woman bought a new transparent nightie, She wore it without underwear and waved to the husband. The excited husband says: “ You look so beautiful and hot, darling. ” The woman says: “ I know that, I tried it that way in the shop and the seller was the first to tell me that….

A blonde is swimming in a river. A man walks up and asks her, “What are you doing in there?” She says, “I’m washing my clothes.” The man asks, “Why don’t you use a washing machine?” The blonde says, “I tried that, but it was too dizzy.

Three chicks were stranded on an deserted island – a brunette, redhead, and a blonde. The brunette looked over the water to the mainland and estimated about 20 miles to shore, so she announced, “I’m going to try to swim to shore.” She swam out five miles and got really tired, by the time she…