YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGZINE
His father said, “Son, we’d give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your mother just lost her job. There’s no way we can afford it.” The next day the father saw little Johnny heading out the front door with a suitcase. So he asked, “Son, where are you going?” Little…
A doctor and his wife were sunbathing on a beach when a well-endowed, beautiful, young, blonde woman in a tight-fitting bikini strolled passed. The woman looked at the doctor, smiled seductively, and said in a very sexy voice,“Hi there handsome. How are you doing?” before wiggling her backside and walking off.“Who was that?” demanded the…
there’s a woman who wants to get a breast implant… She talks to her doctor and he says “I have the perfect product for you! We invented a pump that can be inflated by flapping your upper arms. If you want to deflate when you, say, go running, you can deflate them by pushing a…
A blonde and a brunette got stuck in an elevator..Blonde starts shouting:“Help! Help!”Brunette turns to her and says:“We should shout together.”Blonde:“Together! Together!”
A wife sent a message to her husband: “Don’t forget to buy vegetables on your way back from the office, and Priscilla says hi to you.” Husband: Who is Priscilla? Wife: Nobody, I was just making sure you read my message. Husband: But I’m with Priscilla right now, so which Priscilla are you talking about?…
This woman is walking past a brothel, when she notices a sign which readsCelebrity S*xWayne Rooney $500 per nightBabe Ruth $700 per nightFather Christmas $2000 per nightSo she goes in to enquire about the price list, the manager tells her that the reason Wayne Rooney is so cheap is because he ‘dribbles before he shoots’,and…
A man saw a lady with big вrеаsтs. He asked, “Excuse me, can I bite your вrеаsтs for $1000?”She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her вrеаsтs for 10 minutes.”Eventually the lady asks, “Aren’t you gonna bite them?”He replies, “No, it’s too…
A drunк woman, stark nакеd, jumped into a taxi in New York City. The taxi driver, who happened to be an old Punjabi man, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman. He made no attempt to start the cab.She said to him, “What’s wrong with you honey? Haven’t you ever seen a nакеd…
One day, the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring.“Where did you get that ring?” her husband asks.“Well, she replies,“My boss and I played the lottery and we won, so I bought it with my share of the winnings.”A week later, his wife comes home with a long shiny fur coat.Where did you get…
My wife and I sat down with our son and I said… “Billy, you were adopted.” Billy looked at us. His face was red and full of anger “I demand to meet my biological parents!” My wife softly said “We ARE your biological parents. Now, hurry and pack.”