Ted comes home blackout drunk, as he does most nights.
Ted comes home blackout drunk, as he does most nights. With his eyes barely open, he misses his friend Carl in bed with his wife. He lies down and instantly passes out. Carl panics and quickly sneaks out of the house and makes his way home, hoping that Ted won’t remember anything in the morning.
The next morning, Ted wakes up with a splitting headache and a vague memory of something unusual happening the night before. He staggers to the bathroom and sees a note from his wife: “Dear Ted, sorry for the headache. Carl came over last night and helped you to bed. Just wanted to let you know he left early this morning.”
Ted rubs his temples, still trying to piece together what happened. Suddenly, a loud knock at the door startles him. He shuffles over to answer it, and there stands Carl, looking sheepish.
“Hey man, I’m really sorry about last night,” Carl says. “I don’t know what got into me. It was a mistake, and it’ll never happen again.”
Ted blinks at him blearily. “What are you talking about?” he says. “I don’t remember anything weird happening last night.”
Carl lets out a sigh of relief. “Oh, thank goodness,” he says. “I was afraid you’d be mad at me for sleeping with your wife.”
Ted stares at him, his eyes widening in horror. “Wait, what?” he says. “You slept with my wife? Then who the hell did I have s-x with?”