Best Way to Burn Calories
They say that during s*x you burn off asmany calories as running eight miles.Who the hell runs eight miles in 30 seconds?
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Man Hates Cat
would always beat him home.At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge,then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there.Hours later the man calls home to his wife: “Jen, is the…
1 Dollar for Dirty Joke
There was a homeless man with a sign that said “I dollar for dirty joke.”Seemed like a good investment to me so I gladly handed over a dollar. Homeless man: “There is black rooster alright? How many legs does that chicken have?”Me: “Two?”Homeless man: “Right, now how many wings this black rooster got?”Me: “Two?”Homeless man:…
My husband and I were day Dreaming
My husband and I were day dreaming about what we would do if we won the lottery.I started: “I’d hire a cook SO that I could just say, ‘Hey, make me a sandwich!’” Thomas shook his head. “Not me. I already have one of those.”
Wife on Bed with a Lover
are six feet in this bed. There should only be four. What’s going on?”“You’re so drunk you miscounted,” said the wife. Get out of bed and try again. You can see better from over there.The husband climbed out of bed and counted. One, two, three, four. Damn, you’re right.
Standing on it
Teacher:”why are you late”Mani:”there was a man who lost a 100$ note”Teacher:”that’s nice.were you helping him look for it ?”Mani : ” No i was standing on it “
When a Lady go to the Gynecologist
it rains, and you get the same reaction, I want you to come straight in. OK?”About two weeks later, after two days of steady rain, she’s in a fair amount of discomfort and heads to the Dr’s office. The Dr has her stand in front of him and gets her to lift up her skirt….
A Taxi Driver Accidentally Reached Heaven
the last forty-three years.” St Peter consults his list. He says to the minister, “Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven.” “Just a minute,” says the minister. “That man was a taxi driver, and he gets a silken robe and golden staff. How can this be?!” “Up here, we…
