A man went to the doctor’s office to get a double dose of Viagra.The doctor told him that he couldn’t allow him a double dose. “Why not?” asked the man.”Because it’s not safe,” replied the doctor. “But I need it really bad,” said the man. “Well, why do you need it so badly?” asked the…

A women married and had 13 children. Her husband died. She married again and had 7 more children. Again, Her husband died. But, she remarried and this time had 5 more children. Alas, she finally died. Standing before her coffin, the preacher prayed for her . He thanked the Lord for this very loving woman…

A husband exclaims to his wife one day, “Your butt is getting really big. It’s bigger than the BBQ grill!” Later that night in bed, the husband makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off.“What’s wrong?” he asks.She answers, “Do you really think I’m going to fire up this big-ass grill for…

A man and a woman were having drinks when they got into an argument about who enjoyed s*x more.The man said, “Men obviously enjoy sex more than women. Why do you think we’re so obsessed with…getting laid?” “That doesn’t prove anything,” the woman countered. “Think about this…when your ear itches and you put your finger…

“Hi handsome! Is that a gun in your hand or are you justpleased to see me?”“It’s a gun,” he replied

He’s called Jack the Whistler because by putting two fingersin his mouth his whistle can be heard over a mile away. Oneevening, Jack takes his girlfriend down lovers’ lane and bythe time they’re ready to go home it’s very late and they catchsight of the last bus disappearing round the corner.“Quick, Jack, whistle,” urges the…

Mum walks into the bedroom to find her daughter in fits oftears.“Oh mum, it’s so unfair. Yesterday, Derek said he’d buy me adiamond ring if I stayed the night with him. So I did, but allhe bought was a cheap trinket.”“My darling,” says Mum. “Always remember this and youwon’t fall into the trap again. When…

After thrashing away for a good five minutes, the man layback on the bed smiling smugly.“How was it for you, darling, good?”“Quite painless actually,” she replied. “I never felt a thing.”

A girl was sitting on table . Her friend saw markson her knees . “Why have you got those marks on your knees?” her friendasked.“Oh, it’s making love, doggie style.”“Well, why don’t you change positions?”“I’m willing, but the dog isn’t.”

The boy was so frustrated. He’d been seeing this girl forover a month but apart from some kissing and cuddling,he’d never made a move on her because he was embarrassed at the small size of his willy. Eventually, he plucked up all hiscourage took it out and placed it in her hand.“No thanks,” she said,…