YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGZINE
A priest and a nun are on their way back from the seminary when their car breaks down. The garage doesn’t open until morning so they have to spend the night in a B&B. It only has one room available. The priest says: “Sister, I don’t think the Lord would object if we spend the…
One day the teacher walks into her classroom and notices that someone has written the word P*NIS in tiny letters on the blackboard. She scans the class looking for a guilty face. Finding none, she erases the obscenity and begins class. The next day, the word P*NIS is written on the board again, this time…
A girl came skipping home FROM school one day. “Mommy, Mommy,” she yelled, “we were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7, 8, 9, 10!” “Very good,” said her mother. “Is it because I’m blonde, Mommy?” “Yes, Honey,…
A man goes to confessional and tells the priest, “Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I took the Lord’s name in vain while golfing.” Long “I understand, my son,” the priest says. “I play the game as well, and it can be frustrating. What happened?” “Well,” the man says, “I hit my drive on…
A husband and wife are having dinner at a very fine restaurant when an absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big open-mouthed kiss, then says she’ll see him later and walks away. The wife glares at her husband and says, “Who in the hell was that?” “Oh,”…
The pilot safely performs an emergency landing in water, and tells the passengers to remain seated and to keep the doors closed, stating that in emergency situations, the aircraft is designed to stay afloat for 30 minutes, giving rescuers time to get to them. Just then a man gets out if his seat and runs…
Out on the golf course with his wife, the husband says, “Twenty years ago I had a brief affair. It meant nothing. I hope you can forgive me.” His wife was hurt but said, “Dearest, those days are long gone. What we have now is far more valuable. I forgive you.” They embraced and kissed,…
On his first day he took off his clothes and started to wander around the area. A gorgeous petite blonde walks by, and the man immediately gets an er@ction. The woman notices his er@ction, walks over to him and asks, “did you call for me?” The man, obviously embarrassed, replies, “No, what do you mean?”…
In the jungle a hyena was talking to a monkey. He said to the monkey “You see that big clump of trees over there?” The monkey says “Yes, what about them?” “Well, I go through there every day to get home, I don’t have to, it’s just a shortcut” said the hyena “Alright, so?” asked…
A man and his wife went to a “s*xologist”. The “Doctor” took the husband in first. The husband was a bit embarrassed and told the “Doctor” he had trouble getting an erection with his wife and she was getting frustrated. He checked his blood pressure and other things and finally told him he would see…