YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGZINE
A British man was stopped by a French gendarme and asked to give a breathalyser test. It happened near Le Bugue in the Dordogne and at the time he was stopped he was as drunk as a skunk. The gendarme signals to him to wind down the window then asks him if he has been…
A little while after tucking their three-year-old boy Georgie in for bed one night, his parents heard sobbing coming from his room. Rushing back in, they found him by now crying hysterically. He managed to tell them that he had swallowed a penny and he was sure he was going to die. No amount of…
Back in the frontier days, a westbound wagon train was lost and low on food. No other humans had been seen for days, when finally they saw an “Old Jewish Man” sitting beneath a tree. The leader rushed to him and said, “We’re lost and running out of food. Is there someplace ahead where we…
A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said, “I hope I haven’t made you feel ill at ease; it’s just that you look…
A boy is selling fish on a corner. To get his customers’ attention, he is yelling, “Dam fish for sale! Get your dam fish here!” The local pastor hears this and asks, “Why are you calling them ‘dam’ fish?” The boy says, “Because I caught these fish at the local dam!” The pastor buys a couple fish, takes…
A blind man decided to visit Texas. When he boarded the plane, he felt the seats and said, “Wow, these seats are big!” The person next to him answered, “Everything is big in Texas.” When he finally landed in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving, he ordered a beer and got a…
A little boy attended his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, “How many women can a man marry?” “Sixteen,” the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly and asked, “How do you know that?” “Easy,” said the boy, “Do the math, like the Bishop said: 4…
A 5-year old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting furniture, he looked up and said, “Grandma, how come you don’t have a boyfriend?” Grandma replied, “Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day…
Marty, the juggler, is driving to his next performance on Highway 277 in Texas. Suddenly he hears police sirens and a moment later the cop in the cruiser signals for him to stop. The cop checks out the inside of the car and asks, “What are these matches and lighter fluid doing in your car?”…
Every time an American Indian of a large tribe walks into the chief’s teepee he sees that the chief is masturbating. They finally realize this is a serious problem, so they fix him up with a nice woman, and she starts living with him in his teepee. One day, one of the tribe walks into…