A guy walks into a bar with two black eyes after a church service.
His friend ask “Dale, what the hell happened to your face?”
“When the lady sitting in front of me stood up to sing the hymns, I noticed her dress was clutched between her butt cheeks, so, being poIite I pulled it out, she turned around and punched me in the eye.”
“Well, how did you get the other black eye?”
“She got so upset that I pulled the dress out, I figured I would just push it right back in. “