YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGZINE
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. “Careful,” he said, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going…
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He’s rather taken aback because he can’t place where he knows her from. So he says, “Do you know me?” To which she replies, “I think you’re the father of one of my kids.” Now his mind travels…
My wife comes home from the tattoo parlour She has a tattoo right on her left n*pple I ask her why, and she replies with, “tat for tit”
A couple returns from their honeymoon refusing to speak to each other. The groom’s best friend takes him aside and asks what’s wrong. “Well,” replies the man, “when we finished making love on the first night, I put a $50 bill on the pillow without thinking.” “Oh, you shouldn’t worry about that too much,” says…
Teacher in class asks riddles. She asks little Johnny: “It’s a small animal with 4 legs. What is it?” Little Johnny says: “Dog.” Teacher replies: “But could be a cat too. Alright, another one. It’s a long, thin animal with no legs.” Little Johnny: “A snake.” Teacher: “Could be. But could also be an eel.”…
On their first date, a man asked his companion if she’d like a drink with dinner. “Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?” she said. Later, he offered her a cigarette. “Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?” she said again. On the drive home, he saw a motel….
A Man Is Lying In Bed In The Hospital Wearing An Oxygen Mask Over His Mouth And Nose A young student nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. “Nurse,”‘ he mumbles from behind the mask, “are my testicles black?” Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, Sir. I’m only here to wash…
I was once passing through a town in England when this lady stopped me because she needed help fixing her car that had broken down. As I was fixing the car, the lady would cross the road and shout “Hello” at me. This happened a few times as the lady found it really amusing. I…
It was AD 1095 and all the good knights were leaving for the Crusades. One knight told his best friend, “My bride is without doubt one of the most beautiful women in the world. It would be a terrible waste if no man could have her… … Therefore, as my best and most trusted friend,…
As soon as the newlyweds returned from their honeymoon, the young bride called her mother, who lived a couple of hours away. “How did everything go?” her mom asked. “Oh, mother,” she began, “The honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic, we had a terrific time. But, mother, on our way back, Andy started using really horrible…