YOUR LIFESTYLE MAGZINE
One morning a blind bunny was hopping down the bunny trail and tripped over a large snake and fell, kerplop right on his twitchy little nose. “Oh please excuse me,” said the bunny. I didn’t mean to trip over you, but I’m blind and can’t see.” “That’s perfectly all right,” replied the snake. “To be…
Sarah, a very smart little girl, sits in class. The teacher says, “Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?” Sarah waves her hand, “Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!” Miss Rogers says, “All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?” Sarah says, “Mas-tur-bate.” Miss Rogers…
A mother and her young son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. Mid-flight the boy turned from the window to his mother and asked, “If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don’t big planes have baby planes?” The mother said, “Well, maybe that’s something you could…
A woman goes into a store to buy a fishing rod and reel. She doesn’t know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the register. There is a store employee standing there with dark shades on. She says, “Excuse me sir… can you tell me anything about this rod…
A couple, both age 78, went to a s*x therapist’s office. The doctor asked, “What can I do for you?” The man said, “Will you watch us have s*x?” The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed. When the couple finished the doctor said, “There’s nothing wrong with the way you have s*x,” and charged them $50….
A little girl and her brother are whispering to each other. A moment later, the little boy gets up and walks over to his Grandpa and says, “Grandpa, please make a frog noise.” Grandpa says, “No.” The little boy goes on, “Please… please make a frog noise.” Grandpa says, “No, now go play.” The little…
A mother and father take their son to the Zoo. While standing at the elephant enclosure enclosure a bull elephant produces a huge erection. The young lad shouts “Mommy, whats that big thing hanging down?” All the people around her are laughing and she is very embarrassed. Mother “Hush now, thats his trunk.” Boy “(Loudly)…
A lady worked at a meat distribution factory. One day, when she finished with her work schedule, she went into the meat cold room (Freezer) to inspect something, but in a moment of misfortune, the door closed and she was locked inside with no help in sight. Although she screamed and knocked with all her…
Being creative with the history of troublesome kin. You are working on your family genealogy and for sake of example, let’s say that your great-great uncle, Remus Starr, a fellow lacking in character, was hanged for horse stealing and train robbery in Montana in 1889. A cousin has supplied you with the only known photograph…
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor…