A one day little Johnny asks his dad if he can take a shower with him. The dad says “yes, but don’t look down.” So the johnny is in the shower with his dad and he looks down and asks what it is. The dad replies it’s a snake. Then he asks if he can…

Little Johnny is in class one day and little Timmy starts laughing. The teacher says what’s so funny? He said I can see your bra strap. The teacher says don’t come back to class for a week, so he get up and walked out. A few minutes later little Billy starts laughing, and she ask…

An old couple is ready to go to sleep. The old man lies on the bed but the old woman lies down on the floor. The old man asks, ”Why are you going to sleep on the floor?” The old woman says, “Because I want to feel something hard for a change.”

A young couple, just married, were in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they undressed for bed, the husband, who was a big burly man, tossed his pants to his bride and said, “here put these on.” She put them on, and the waist was twice the size of her body. “I can’t…

A small, balding man storms into a local bar and demands, “Gimme a double of the strongest whiskey you got. I’m so mad, I can’t even see straight.” The bartender, noticing that the little man is a bit worse for the wear, pours him a double of Southern Comfort. The man swills down the drink and…

A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it’s half past three in the morning. I’m not getting out of bed at this time, he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. Aren’t you going to…

He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it’s 3:30 in the morning. “I’m not getting out of bed at this time,” he thinks, and rolls over. Then a louder knock follows. “Aren’t you going to answer that?” says his wife. So he drags himself out of bed and goes downstairs. He opens the…

“Bill walks into a bar and finds his friend Joe sitting on a stool. “Joe,” Bill says, “I’m glad to see your wife finally let you out of the house.” “Things have been different with my wife,” Joe says. “In fact, just the other day, I decided to show her who was boss.” “How did…

A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn’t paying attention, so she asks him, “If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?” Johnny says, “None.” The teacher asks, “Why?” Johnny says, “Because the shot scared them all off.” The teacher says, “No,…

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University . On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the…