The missus came home steaming drunk last night. “You up for some role play action, babe?” She asked with a wink. “Not really.” I replied. “Oh, come on.” She said. “We can act out ANY scene, from ANY film you want.” Walking over to her with a huge smile on my face, I noticed her…

A woman arrived at a party. While scanning the guests there, she spotted an attractive man standing alone. So she approached him, smiled and said politely, “Hello, my name is Carmen.” “That’s a beautiful name”, he replied, “Is it a family name?” “No”, she replied, “As a matter of fact, I gave it to myself….

St Peter asks these three Nuns a question before they can enter heaven Three nuns are travelling in a bus when it crashes. All of the nuns died instantly, and find themselves standing in front of the Pearly Gates, where St Peter is waiting for them. He said to the nuns, “Before I can let…

Three women friends, one in a casual relationship, one engaged to be married and one a long-time wife, met for drinks after work. The conversation eventually drifted towards how best to spice up their love lives. After much discussion, they decided to surprise their men by engaging in some S&M role playing. The following week…

There is this girl, she is five. She goes spying on her big sister and she hears her cussing out her boyfriend she says, “you mother f*ck!ng @$$h0le!” Just then jill, that’s the little girl, interrupts them talking and blurts out, “Big Sis,what does @$$hole mean? The girl surprised by the question,says, BOYFRIEND! Okay ,…

The man wanted the most expensive lady in the house The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late 40s or early 50s. “May I help you?” she asked. “I want to see Penny,” the man replied. “Sir, Penny is one of our most expensive ladies….

A Young beautiful teacher was giving her class of six year olds a quiz “behind my back I’ve got something red, round and you can eat it. what is it?” she asked. “an apple” replied little Raymond “no,” said the teacher ” it’s a tomato but it shows you are thinking.” “I’ve now got something…

A mother was cleaning her ten year old son’s bedroom one day, when she found an adult bondage magazine under his mattress. She was mortified. She put the dirty magazine back under the mattress, thinking that she would show her husband when he got home from work. A few hours later when he got home,…

A Wife leaves her Cat in the care of the Husband A woman went on vacation, leaving her husband behind. Before she left, she told him to take extra special care of her beloved cat. The next day she called her husband and asked if the cat was all right. Her husband said, “The cat…

The Dad explains why condoms come in packs of 3, 6 and 12 A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son. They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, “What are these, Dad?” To which the man matter-of-factly replies, “Those are called condoms, son. Men use them…