A knockout young lady wanted to get rich quickly, so she proceeded to find herself a rich 75-year-old man, planning to screw him to death on their wedding night. The courtship and wedding went off without any problem despite the half-century age difference. On the first night of her honeymoon, she got undressed and waited for him to come out of the bathroom to go to bed. When he emerged, however, he had nothing on except a condom to cover a twelve-inch erection and was carrying a pair of earplugs and a pair of nose plugs. Fearing her plan had gone desperately amiss, she asked, “What are those for?” The elderly groom replied, “There are two things I cannot stand: the sound of a woman screaming, and the smell of burning rubber.”